Oh What Fun

By Karen Balice-Gregory





I am one of those “buy all year but finish up at the last minute” people. I love a good bargain so it's nice to shop after the holidays and then look for things during the year that are unique. Things get bagged up and piled in my laundry room and before I know it the holidays are upon us and I don't really know what I have. The last week before Christmas I begin to sort and try to figure out what gift is for whom, how much it cost (roughly), and whether or not I have spent about the same amount of money on everyone. I used to laugh at my mother because she would worry that she may have spent more on one person or the other and then begin to even things up...as if we could figure out the price or even care. The last several years of my father's life he would present us with a special gift of jewelry that he picked out for us girls and that was always (and still is) very special to us. Mom's gifts were usually more practical because she tried to take notice of the necessities lacking in our lives. In my case there was much more need than want so she had difficulty prioritizing the choices.

Of the three grandsons, Miles will be the only one that understands the gift routine and boy is he excited. His list is pretty short and scattered: swords (I unwittingly began playing swords with our flyswatters here and we had to quit after breaking a couple of them), a “spyscope” like the one that Diego uses on t.v. (naturally, no one sells little toy telescopes anymore or at least I haven't been able to find one yet), a tuba (no one knows why he wants one or even where he saw one except maybe on the football field during halftime and needless to say I haven't spotted one of those in miniature either), a screw driver (Lord knows he hasn't seen any of us use that tool very often but he thinks he needs one), and of course he wants anything that has to do with any sport involving a ball. Even though he has dozens of balls in every size, shape and color he wants more. We use wrapping paper cardboard tubes for swords right now and paper towel and toilet paper tubes for spyscopes but he still wants the real thing. I'm looking for a referee shirt also because he is very enamored with the refs at the ball games. Against my better judgment I have already given him a whistle for all of his “pretend” games with all of his “pretend” friends.

Jude (8 mos) and Kavaun (3 mos) are unaware of the Holiday. Of course that has not stopped me from trying to find them things that they just can't live without. I spend a lot of time with these kids and despite the fact that they have far more than they can ever use, there is always something else that they must have. Intellectually I know that they actually have more fun with common items that they find laying around the house, but emotionally I still want to find things that will make them laugh, jump, cuddle, and frankly, keep them occupied for long periods of time. It should be many years before they stop loving me unconditionally or are able to rack up prices in their little heads so I plan to take advantage of that for now.

As for all the other holiday stresses...cards, family and friends gifts, dishes to pass, wrapping, shopping,
and just getting everywhere in one piece and having money and time left over? I never do well with any of it because I procrastinate. If there is one thing that I plan to fix about myself (among so many) in the new year it will be that, but I'll save the ruminating until next week. Enjoy the Holidays.

Meet Abner Marion

Here's the newest addition to the Balice zoo, Abner Marion. Jeff named him after Gladys Kravitz's husband on the TV show Bewitched.

From Jeff:

I adopted 8-month-old Abner Dec. 17 at the Ionia Animal Shelter. He had just been surrendered the day before with his mom. He was so gentle and laid back, not to mention very cute, so I just had to have him. He's part Siamese, which is obvious from his markings and bright blue eyes. He's recovering in my basement from his surgery. In a few days, he'll get to come upstairs to spend time with Millie and me.

I hope all of you are doing well. If any of you are in the neighborhood feel free to stop by to see him and Millie.

Joe remains dedicated to Foot Locker despite bleeding head wound

On Saturday, a few of us were sent the above picture on our phones, with no explanation or credit given. Simply the phrase "yikes."

I finally got Joe on the phone today to explain what the hell happened.

Joe was crazy busy after rushing his panicking roommate ("you know how girls do") to the airport and arriving late at work (Don't worry. He had called ahead).

He picked up a random hanger sitting on a bench and, en route to put it in the box where it belongs, a co-worker shouted for Joe to get a couple of pair of shoes out of the back.

Behind the register, he tossed the hanger and quickly turned around to head to the back room when -- WHAM -- he clocks the front of his head (left side) on a large metal shelf holding basketballs behind the registers. Being tough as nails, he winces, then continues to the back for the shoes.

When a co-worker sees him and says Joe needs to go to the hospital, Joe responds with something like, "It is merely a flesh wound" (OK, not exactly. That was Monty Python. But you get the idea.) and continues in search of the shoes, blood running down his head.

Finally, he set his dedication aside and allowed his co-worker to take him to the emergency room, where he got several staples in his head after waiting only 3 or 4 hours. Fortunately, the co-worker is from Pasadena, so Joe didn't have to go to "county" in L.A.

He is safe and sound and will find someone in Ionia to remove the staples during his stay. We're happy Joe's alive and well and will be joining us for Christmas festivities on Sunday!

Buster Balice-DePover, R.I.P.

Buster began life as a mutt called Freddy and lived at the pound with his
sisters Molly and Dolly. Paul picked him out and brought him home to our
Kelsey Hwy house and declared him to be thence called Buster.

Buster had one true love, a homely bitch called Natasha that lived in a
trailer on Riverside Drive. Buster would sneak through the woods behind
our house and sniff his way to her place whenever he had a chance.

She often came up the hill to his house trying to entice him out of his collar.
One time they "hooked up" and, in fact, she pulled the poor guy, still
"connected" right out of his collar. They had 4 pups together.

One time Paul drove down to Natasha's trailer looking for Buster and, according to
Paul, they were lying in the shade under the trailer and Buster was smoking
a cigarette!

Buster loved spaghetti and ice cream and enjoyed fishing with Paul. He had
the softest coat of any dog in the universe and was possibly the most
loving, nicest dog that ever lived.

He is truly missed.

More photos! Days 3 and 4

Day 3

Thursday was mostly a rainy day, but we had fun, heading into downtown for lunch and to duck into a few shops.

There were parrots -- Lucas does a killer impression.



He loved watching the iguanas outside of Margaritaville having lunch.




Lucas, who is hard pressed to try any new food, spent our lunch sampling salt, sugar and pepper (which is apparently "yucky").



Before we left for our outing into town, Anthony sat up on the table by himself.


And practices for Uncle Joe's visit in a couple of weeks.

Anthony gives his 2 cents on the Caymans.

Cayman Islands Day 1 and Day 2

Get used to it! You will be getting several updates from the Cayman's this week. Aunt Kirsten's taking lots of pictures and will have plenty of time to upload photos while the little ones are sleeping. :)

Day 1

Anthony loved his first airplane trip.

Mostly. When he didn't, mom about had it.

Soon enough, everyone was in the pool and lovin' life.
Anthony figured out how to kick and wasn't too freaked out
by the water -- at least not on day one when it was just his feet.

Day 2

Anthony was not a fan of full pool submersion.
He stayed on the sidelines watching his brother look
for sharks and get splashed by dad's cannonballs.

Although it may not look like it, he's
cracking up in this picture. Loved the sand.

Despite some extreme reluctance, mama got Lucas in the ocean.
Papa joined them and you had to drag the kid out of there.

Again, Anthony a bit overwhelmed by all of the new sights and sounds.

And, last but not least, Lucas' magnetic attraction to my heels
seems to exist, even in another country. He can practically run in them now.

Aunt Kirsten's moment of the day:
Sarah and Lucas are sitting on a chair making a shopping list on the porch. I come outside and sit at a nearby table.

Kirsten: Did you tell mama to put broccoli on the list?

Lucas: (sigh) No.

Kirsten: Did you tell her to put celery on the list?

Lucas: No.

Kirsten: How about cabbage?

Lucas: You're teasing me. Go inside.

Holiday Movies

by Karen Balice-Gregory

What do the holidays mean to me? Sounds like a simple assignment that a teacher might give to a grade school class but maybe we all would be better off if we sat down and articulated it in our own words. After all, if we don't understand why we participate in something we may lose the essence of it all. Everyone has their own perception and specific memories of holidays past. The more years that we tack on to our experiences the more jumbled everything seems to become. The peaks and valleys of our history stand out most vividly so those are generally the times that tend to shape our personal view of what we expect of ourselves and what our expectations are of others. We are limited to whatever we can dig out from the brain cells that we have left. As multiple generations gather round, everyone gets a taste of what it all means...what it should mean...what it can mean...what it used to mean.

Each year as our family evolves, grows and expands to include new personalities we find ourselves still operating from the “old warehouse” of our beginnings. We had the luxury of “old world” grandparents living next door who always went all out to make sure we had fun. I can't for the life of me remember any gifts that they gave us but I do have a very specific vignette of old films reeling in my head at a moment's notice. Sometimes it's tough to distinguish the actual events from the pictures and old movies we've seen over the years...everything becomes blended over time...but I believe that the groundwork was laid with very little thought about whether it was enough in terms of our gratification.
From what I can remember, my grandparents and parents gave us what they could afford and we never expected more or felt deprived. In retrospect, I think we all appreciate their efforts to make sure that we had what we needed even if it meant sharing from time to time. We wore homemade and “hand me downs”, squeezed into small spaces to sleep, eat and study, and had obligations and responsibilities.
We slipped through our childhood not even knowing that our options were limited...what a gift!

If nothing else, this economic downturn has given us all a taste (and a very slight one to be sure) of what it takes to live within our means. We have become such a society of excess raising our children to expect or feel entitled to things that we can not only afford but end up paying for at the expense of real necessities. We are all guilty to a degree because it has been too easy to replace the gift of time with articles of distraction. The more we spend entertaining ourselves trying to escape the rigors of life in general, the fewer the vivid memories of real relaxation with family and friends. Laughter, forgiveness, realistic expectations, love, compassion, support and encouragement don't cost a thing but without them it doesn't really matter what's under the tree. My kids will tell you that they don't remember most of the gifts I have bought them over the years...in fact some of them are stored in their basements and garages (they think I haven't noticed.) They do remember the fact that some years I didn't even wrap them or have a Christmas tree to put them under. At the time I didn't think it mattered and I was so stressed out buying, budgeting, and stressing over the gifts themselves I lost the true meaning of it all.

What goes around comes around and I'm back to square one. My options are limited, I have far more time than money, and even in light of all the new technology and high speed everything I would rather give my children and grandchildren gifts that they can store in their heads and hearts. My ancestors sure knew what they were doing and all of it was produced in small little houses on neighborhood streets outside the confines of Hollywood!

Happy Birthday, Grandpa Tony!

We miss you.

Illinois Christmas

Here are a couple of shots from my Thanksgiving weekend. We were in Champaign, Ill., from Wednesday to Saturday, then spent Saturday night Scrabbing with our friends Charlie and Leah in Chicago.

This is Grandma Betty Fern. Don't be fooled. She's a cutthroat Scrabble player.

This is Grandpa Leroy. He's the strong, silent type.

We got the whole family playing some pretty heated games of Catchphrase.
This was (literally) the only time Dan's mom, Phyllis didn't have to stand to stand up to give her clues.

Uncle Steve (next to Grandma) hasn't been to family Thanksgiving in years.
Even he got in on the Catchphrase action. Grandma was thrilled.

Uncle Scott, his girlfriend Amy (finally! I'm not the newbie!) and Dan's brother Chris.

Dan's brother, Matt turns Cole into Super Cole.

Matt's wife, Mary, struggles to support herself under the weight of their youngest, Titus.

Dan runs "Claire and the Baby Tractor" by Cole and Sepporah (Chris' daughter), which he wrote based on a bedtime story he made up for Claire. My friend Tara's husband, Jesse, is set to illustrate it.

Cole and Sepporah doing "karate" with Uncle Daniel. Grandma Phyllis gives
Titus pointers for when he can walk without looking like a drunk old man.

Since our plan for a manicotti repeat performance in Champaign was foiled by Aunt Trish's spontaneous pizza purchase (she wasn't around for manicotti last year), we took our already-purchased ingredients to Chicago. After dinner, we hunkered down for a game of Scrabble.

Charlie

Leah

Scrabble? Check. Knitting? Check. Delicious cocktail? Check.
Life is good.

Ionia Thanksgiving

Here are some photos from Thanksgiving a la casa de Jefe! It looks like it was a fun time!

Gratitude

by Karen Balice-Gregory

As our families evolve and we become grandparents and great aunts and uncles we begin to realize that nothing can really stay the same. It would be nice if everyone could gather at the same place and time and experience the holidays together “like they used to be” but that just isn't realistic.

All of our children eventually marry, move away or both and traditions must be adjusted to take into consideration the needs and wants of all the extended family members. Sooner or later the young adults want to begin their own customs in their own homes or they compromise with the in-laws trying to split their time between two families ... sometimes many miles away. Throw in divorce, step-parents and siblings and before you know it everyone is spread pretty thin trying to get together with everyone.

A day (or week) of relaxation and celebration becomes a mad dash to get from here to there not only on time but in one piece. You can't wrap gifts before traveling by air for obvious reasons and trying to keep children occupied and quiet for any kind of trip can be exhausting. This holiday season will be one of many transitions but we are all thankful that we still manage to make it work.

People celebrate Thanksgiving many different ways. For many of us there will be family time of one sort or another. We will gather together, eat too much, laugh a lot, commiserate about the economy, and reflect on the past and who and what got us here. With our second generation ranging in age from 16 to 37 there are varied levels of participation, enthusiasm and boredom.

Third generation is comprised of children 10 and under. They will all have fun never noticing any adjustments in food, time, day or anything else for that matter because time is a relative term that they are not too familiar with. They don't have much of a past to dwell on and future to them means later. For the most part they live in the “here and now” ... somewhat of a forgotten art. Instead of worrying about what will happen tomorrow, or next week or next year they are still pretty much in the “play” mode making things up as they go along.

The more that I get into “grandmothering” the more I appreciate the gifts that children offer us. My 3-year-old grandson has recently become quite enamored with his imaginary friends. Most of them have jumped from the television set into his world but he has suddenly discovered that he can gather them together in a moment's notice or send them away when he's tired of them. He rescues them, plays games with them, orders them around and even disciplines them.

His little brother is easily entertained by it all, laughing out loud as he formulates a plan to join in once he becomes more mobile. Our newest addition, the 2-month-old, is just coming into his own. He's smiling more, sleeping better (sort of) and has already become a master manipulator of us all. All three of them definitely keep me busy playing, pretending and remembering how important imagination is.

They'll grow up soon enough and begin to notice how “uncool” I really am so I'd better take advantage of their youthful interpretation of fun. Happy Thanksgiving to you and to all your imaginary friends (and relatives for that matter.)

Birthdays this week!

Happy Birthday KK and Mike!
I hope you both had/have happy days!

Family -- feel free to send me reminders when birthdays, anniversaries, etc. are coming up, along with funny stories and anecdotes about those people. :)

What do you say to the new administration?

Jason Gaylor, one of Dan's friends from Springfield, MO, is part of a design collective there called Departika. He asked Dan to loan some music to an installation piece they did in the lobby of their studios this week where people wrote a message to the new president on the wall. They filmed the whole event and cut the video in time lapse to an instrumental version of Dan's song "Heart of a Dog." I think it's pretty cool.

Check it out HERE.

A real bargain

by Karen Balice-Gregory

Veterans Day has come and gone ... the sales are over ... for some an extra day off work ... but many of us probably spent little time on the significance of it.

If you have a family member or a friend in the Armed Services you are living proof of the sacrifices, and if you have lost a family member or friend in any war you are sensitive to the perils and aftermath. Even though we enjoy the freedoms that we have because of those who have fought and are still fighting, we often forget or take it for granted.

We see it on the news every day. We read about it in the paper. We have access to just about every detail of war or conflict happening in the world but it's difficult to grasp the enormity of the ramifications, let alone feel as if we can do anything about it. The cost alone in terms of lives lost or maimed (physically, mentally, emotionally and morally) coupled with the enormous amount of money borrowed and spent is mind boggling. We try to understand the premise of war and our country keeps committing to bringing about peace in the world by engaging in it, but there appears to be no end in sight for winning this battle for Human Rights.

We Baby Boomers have grown up in the midst of parents and grandparents who survived or fought in wars before many of us were born. Many of our friends, family and classmates were drafted in the 70's to fight in Viet Nam.

I remember quite clearly the day that we huddled around our televisions when the numbers were drawn dictating who had an unlucky birth date and who might be spared. There was a mad dash at the time to join the National Guard or Reserve, apply for a deferment or just prepare for the worst. People thinking about getting married, having children, going to school or starting a career felt pressure to either escalate or deescalate their plans. Protesters were fueling the fires and patriotism at the time was being questioned if not totally redefined. The 60's revolution harbored a “peace baby” mentality that evolved into a panic situation stirring riots and fostering mandates that confused, agitated and motivated the masses on all sides.

Personally, I went through many stages of acknowledgment, ambivalence, appreciation and grief that would last for decades. I saw death though the eyes of a classmate who's brother returned in a casket displayed at the local funeral home under a plastic bubble due to the prevailing fear that even a corpse might spread disease among us. I sent packages to a friend fighting in the jungle and greeted him at my door when he returned to thank my father for his support during a wartime predicament.

It has taken many years for the snapshots in my head of those times to catch up with the reality of the pain and loss that people in the military endure. PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) is how experts eventually described the chaos that takes place in persons brain when they engage in war or something like it, but so far no one has figured out how to alleviate it.

Our Veterans, who have given the most for our freedom, are still fighting for the respect they deserve when it comes to getting the best equipment, training, and supplies as well as superior care and treatment upon their return. Their families should be recognized for fostering the strength of their loved ones as well as supporting them against painful odds.

Celebrating Veterans Day goes way beyond making it a Federal Holiday, having a parade in their honor or, last and least, claiming a department store sale has anything to do with any war except the ones fought for the best bargain. Now that I think of it, I guess there is a correlation between bargain basement shopping and Veterans Day.

Our country has received a literal “bang for our buck” over the years. We continue to have citizens who step up to the plate and give and give and give without expecting much in return. Our respect, gratitude and support is a small price to pay especially given the fact that our Veterans are ultimately picking up the tab. Thanks for a job well done.

Coffee Mug Chocolate Cake!

Sorry for the lack of posts. I've been extremely busy getting ready for the craft fair this weekend -- and I can't wait to see some of you!

In the meantime, I thought I would share a little experiment Claire and I did last night. Even if you don't have kids (or grandkids!) around, it took about 2 minutes, so give it a shot!

A friend e-mailed this recipe to me and I knew it was something Claire would love.

Even though I told her Sally e-mailed me the directions, she said, "You should get a job cooking. You love cooking, right?" After she finally tasted the gooey mess, she said, "Now you really should get a job cooking."

Step 1. Get a large mug and spray it with cooking spray.

Step 2. Measure 4 Tbsp. flour and 9 Tbsp. hot cocoa mix into mug



Step 3. Crack an egg into the mug and mix as best you can.



Step 4. Add 3 Tbsp. water and 3 Tbsp. vegetable oil. Mix thoroughly until all dry ingredients are wet. Be sure to scrape the bottom to get all the flour and cocoa!



(Here we added some marshmallows and mini chocolate chips, but they all melted during the "baking." But, they were still melty and good.)



Step 5. Microwave on high for 3 minutes*. During microwaving, the cylinder of cake will rise out of the mug. As soon as the microwave stops, it will slink back into the cup.



* I looked at it and the top looked all sticky and wet so I thought it wasn't done and put it in for another minute. Four minutes was fine/didn't overcook it, but it still was wet looking after 4 minutes but was thoroughly cooked. I think 3 would have been fine.

Step 6. Turn over cup and tap until the cake falls out onto the plate. It will be extremely hot -- look at the steam! (And the bits of flour I didn't get quite mixed in.)


Step 7. Add any toppings, frosting, etc. you might like. We went for more marshmallows, chocolate chips and some chocolate sauce.





Step 8. Enjoy! Claire (and dad) tell me it was delicious.



Since I don't like chocolate, I decided to make one out of my Ghiradelli white chocolate hot chocolate. Having never had white chocolate cake, I have nothing too compare it to, but it was a pretty good little treat!